Are you Katniss and Peeta or Daenerys and Khal Drogo?
Flickr / Qtea / Via Flickr: 42918434@N00
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Showing posts with label 2014 at 07:40AM. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 2014 at 07:40AM. Show all posts
Wednesday, 12 March 2014
New York City Apartments: A Translation Guide
Oh, you want to find a somewhat comfortable, moderately affordable place to live? You’re adorable.
Cozy = How attached are you to your full-size bed? Or any bed, really?
Spacious = Remember that weirdly narrow dorm room on your floor in college where the loner kid who came back from studying abroad had to live because it was the only one available? Yeah, like that.
Sun-drenched = Has a window (maybe).
Walk-in closet = Closet.
Brand-new stainless steel appliances = Appliances.
Steps to trains = A mile's worth of steps, to be exact.
Park-adjacent = There is a tree somewhere on the block. It might be a dead Christmas tree from three months earlier, but it's there.
Tons of storage = See “walk-in closet.”
420 friendly = There will literally never not be smoke everywhere, in your hair, in your lungs, on your clothes, in your life.
Perfect for roommates = So small that you and your BFF will stop speaking within months.
Perfect for couples = So small that you and your boo will break up within months.
Walk-up building = Walk alllllll the way up. No, keeping going. Almost there. Feel free to stop and catch your breath. Yes, OK, that's it.
Live/work = Not remotely legal.
Loft = Basically a regular apartment except you can definitely hear your roommates having sex.
Rooftop access = The building does indeed have a surface on top of it. Good luck getting up there, and woe betide you when you try to get back down.
Balcony = Rusty fire escape permanently encrusted with cigarettes that do not belong to you.
Eat-in kitchen = The only way you can “eat in” (ew) here is if you swap out your refrigerator for a card table.
Laundry = There is a coin-operated laundromat seven blocks away. Do not sit on the chairs there. Trust me.
Close to shops, bars, and restaurants! = Close to cell phone providers, bodegas, and nail-salons-slash-unisex-barbers where the curtains are always closed!
Garden = 9 square feet of sad, broken cement.
Shared garden = 3 square feet of sad, broken cement.
Pre-war building = Henry Hudson didn't need the internet, so why should you?
Post-war building = Converted hospital.
Safe neighborhood = Nice try, you can't even afford a beer here.
Quiet neighborhood = You will have to relinquish your seat at the bar for somebody's baby. Unless you have your own baby. If not, GET OUT.
Up-and-coming neighborhood = Do not invite your parents to visit you.
Bedwick/Parkwanus/ProCro = These neighborhoods were invented by real estate agents and do not exist. You might as well get a studio in Hyrule or Hogsmeade.
Right off the [specific, fairly desirable stop] on the [subway line] = at least three stops beyond that one.
Exposed brick = The previous tenant punched a hole in the particle board.
Original molding = Roaring mouse infestation.
Recently renovated = Recently repainted and then inflated to twice the original rent.
Comes partially furnished = Comes partially bed bugged.
$50 application fee = The broker has decided that he or she would like to have $50.
Photos are of a comparable apartment in the building = Your place will resemble a garbage pit. And not even THIS garbage pit.
We have plenty more apartments available in the area! = This listing is 100% fabricated and the 20-year-old agent who refuses to communicate except by text will act confused/amused/angry when you ask about it before trying to sell you on something 30 blocks away, $400 more expensive, and roughly five times as shitty.
No broker's fee = Enormous broker's fee.
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11 Maps Of Countries And Continents Made From Their Iconic Foods
Henry Hargreaves and Caitlin Levin put these clever maps together.
Henry tells BuzzFeed: “They were inspired by our passion for travel.”
Caitlin Levin / Henry Hargreaves
“Exploring new places through the food you eat is often a portal to the cultural complexities of that place.”
Caitlin Levin / Henry Hargreaves
“While we know that tomatoes originally came from the Andes in South America, Italy has become the tomato king.”
Caitlin Levin / Henry Hargreaves
“These maps show how food has traveled the globe – transforming and becoming a part of the cultural identity of that place.”
Caitlin Levin / Henry Hargreaves
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Jason Derulo Made A Version Of “Talk Dirty” With One Direction And Larry King
And, like, a bunch of other people too.
Jason Derulo just made a brand new music video for “Talk Dirty.”
It's just like the original version of “Talk Dirty” except for it has Larry King.
And Robin Thicke.
And Fifth Harmony.
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Macklemore Just Recorded A Song On Instagram About Putting The Toilet Seat Down After You Pee
It’s like a public service announcement or something I guess.
Macklemore posted this very helpful Instagram video about how to clean and put the seat down for your girlfriend after you pee.
ITS TIME THAT US MEN STARTED RESPECTING TO THE BASIN THAT OUR QUEENS SIT ON! LETS RAISE THE NEXT GENERATION TO HAVE BETTER AIM SO WOMEN DONT HAVE TO PEE & POOP ON OUR PEE!…and IM NOT TRYING TO POOP ON YOUR PEE EITHER! BASICALLY, TO ALL THE FRAT GUYS AND SHITTY DADS, QUIT FUCKING UP THE DEUCE SESH FOR THE REST OF US! BUMP THIS CUT IN ALL AIRPORT BATHROOMS AND FOOTBALL GAMES! FUCK A DRUNK DAD PISSING ON THE GROUND, AND A FRAT BRO TOO HAMMERED TO HANDLE HIS DANGLER! MAN UP AND LEARN DONG CONTROL!…IM OUT!!!
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8 Illustrated Truths About Getting Sick In America
“Here’s a fistful of Tylenol. Your copay is $500,000.”
Insurance:
How to exaggerate your pain to get immediate attention:
Visiting 5 doctors to find out what's wrong with your body:
Medical bills:
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The post 8 Illustrated Truths About Getting Sick In America appeared first on iPhone 6.
Tokyo’s Street Fashion Is Ridiculous And Amazing
Photographer Thomas C Card spent Spring 2012 taking these photos. They’re the loopiest looks you’ll see today.
Japanese fashion tribes originated in the early 1990s.
Thomas C Card
Young people, particularly young women, began rebelling against traditional Japanese culture.
Thomas C Card
Marked by playfulness and inventiveness, these styles have impacted fashion trends around the world.
Thomas C Card
These images are from Tokyo Adorned, Card's first book.
Thomas C Card
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The post Tokyo’s Street Fashion Is Ridiculous And Amazing appeared first on iPhone 6.
17 Mind-Boggling 3D Paintings
Joe & Max (aka 3D Joe & Max) travel the world creating their amazing artworks for a range of corporate and charitable clients.
3D Joe and Max / Via 3djoeandmax.com
3D Joe and Max / Via 3djoeandmax.com
3D Joe and Max / Via 3djoeandmax.com
3D Joe and Max / Via 3djoeandmax.com
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Tuesday, 4 March 2014
17 Shocking Food Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO BELIEVE ANYMORE .
All Froot Loops taste the same, no matter what color they are.
The Straight Dope revealed it, Reddit reminded us, and Foodbeast confirms.
This is what's really going on inside a cup o' noodles:
To be fair, the extra space underneath is there to let the noodles cook and expand evenly, not to cheat you of your precious, hard-earned instant meal replacement.
Twinkies definitely don't last forever.
Sorry, but your stash of individually packaged golden nuggets is only good for about 45 days.
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The post 17 Shocking Food Facts That Will Make You Question Everything appeared first on iPhone 6.
Iggy Azalea And Charli XCX’s New Music Video Is An Homage To “Clueless” And It. Is. EVERYTHING.
I’m dead.
!!!!!!!!!!
Via youtube.com
QUEEN OF THE MIAMI TRAILER PARKS, IGGY AZALEA.
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The post Iggy Azalea And Charli XCX’s New Music Video Is An Homage To “Clueless” And It. Is. EVERYTHING. appeared first on iPhone 6.
70 Stunningly Beautiful Images From Rio De Janeiro’s Carnival
Did you miss this year’s carnival? Don’t worry, here are all the things you need to see.
Pilar Olivares / Reuters
Sergio Moraes / Reuters
AP Photo/Felipe Dana
AP Photo/Felipe Dana
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Anna Wintour Sits Second Row At Paris Fashion Week, World Still Spins
Is that it? Is fashion over now? Did she just say “shut it down?” Do we have to be naked now?!
Today Valentino held its show at Paris Fashion Week.
And while the clothing was beautiful…
It was hard to focus because Anna Wintour, a major fixture of the front row, was sitting IN THE SECOND ROW instead.
So uncivilized.
There aren't even photos of her at the show because she's not in the front row.
Dear assistant, RUN. DUCK. HIDE. PURCHASE LIFE INSURANCE.
Twentieth Century Fox
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Monday, 3 March 2014
How The Internet Reacted To Russia Invading Ukraine
Lot of jokes, lots of anger.
David Mdzinarishvili / Reuters
Reuters
Here is how the internet responded.
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The post How The Internet Reacted To Russia Invading Ukraine appeared first on iPhone 6.
29 Stylish Home Accessories Under $100 To Upgrade Any Guy’s Pad
It doesn’t take a lot of money to add a lot of style to your space.
Chris Ritter/ BuzzFeed
Candle, $6
Nothing sets a mood better than candles, and this one is both masculine and unscented, which is perfect for anyone who is allergic to and/or hates synthetic scents.
Via hm.com
Patchwork Side Table, $90
This side table is a nice mix of both rustic and industrial. Plus the drawer is a perfect spot to store everything from those extra remotes to condoms.
Via target.com
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Definitive Proof That Jennifer Lawrence Is A Fainting Goat In Disguise
Mystery solved.
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Will Smith Recognized An Oscar Red Carpet Camera Man From His “Fresh Prince” Days
Good guy Will, doesn’t forget faces even if they are behind the camera!
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The post Will Smith Recognized An Oscar Red Carpet Camera Man From His “Fresh Prince” Days appeared first on iPhone 6.
Arby’s Bought Pharrell’s Huge Mountain Ranger Hat On eBay For $44,000
Because of course they did.
Pharrell debuted his insane looking mountain ranger hat at the Grammy's last month.
Matt Sayles/Invision / AP, file
And people immediately noticed that it strongly resembled the Arby's logo.
Pharrell then put the Vivienne Westwood “Jelly Mould” hat on eBay, with all the proceeds going towards to the One Hand To AnOTHER charity.
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The post Arby’s Bought Pharrell’s Huge Mountain Ranger Hat On eBay For $44,000 appeared first on iPhone 6.
24 Stunning Portraits From The Vanity Fair Oscar Party
Mark Seliger shot special Instagram portraits of Lupita Nyong’o, Jon Hamm, Bill Murray, and other Hollywood A-listers at the legendary after-party.
Lupita Nyong'o:
Bill Murray:
Samuel L. Jackson:
Selena Gomez:
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The post 24 Stunning Portraits From The Vanity Fair Oscar Party appeared first on iPhone 6.
This Vine Will Forever Change The Way You Look At “Flappy Bird”
In an alternate universe …
LINK: Jordan Burt
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The post This Vine Will Forever Change The Way You Look At “Flappy Bird” appeared first on iPhone 6.
35 Signs You Were Raised By Greek Parents
“Μην τολμήσεις!”
You have the cleaning standards of a five-star hotel.
gifsoup.com / Via youtube.com
And you think Viakal is God.
…solving all those stubborn first world problems
tesco.com / Via Viakal
When you accidently walk on the floor mama just mopped.
Walking barefoot on marble floors means you'll get a sore throat.
Flickr: thiesson / Via Creative Commons
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